Family Fun in Lockdown

Yesterday was my youngest son's birthday.  We now have 3 teenagers!  He was supposed to have gone to a CAVS game with his Dad (he had won pretty awesome seats at a basketball camp last summer).  But instead, we were all at home.  He has had a great attitude.  Besides getting to pick what we ate all day, he decided our dinner was going to have a "twist".  Eating spaghetti, but no hands allowed!  It definitely turned an ordinary meal into something we will all remember.  And we now have more empathy for our dog, who eats with no hands every day.

One thing that Brady has been really into lately is Rubik's cubes.  He has many different varieties and can solve the basic 3x3 in under 20 seconds.  Blows my mind!  Since I suddenly have all this time on my hands, I decided that I'm going to let him teach me something that he loves.  My brain isn't as quick as it used to be, so I'm only doing it one step at a time.  Once I get comfortable with that, I have him teach me the next one.  By next week I may have solved my first Rubik's cube 😁

But the most fun we've had is with our family project!  It started out as an idea to record a song.  Ever since being in a quartet at church this Christmas, Jeremy and Jacob have wanted to find another song to sing.  So we decided to look for a quartet and record it, each of them singing two parts.  (It works perfectly that my son has a lower singing voice than his Dad).  I found one of my favorite quartet songs, For the Longest Time by Billy Joel.  Then this idea came to me to re-write the words and make it a parody....since we were going to be stuck at home "for the longest time".  Within a few hours, I had written a rough draft of the lyrics.  Who knew I had some hidden songwriting ability.  Jeremy and the boys made some changes and tweaked some words and we were good to go!  Then it got taken one step further.  Instead of just singing the song, let's shoot video to go along with it.  This project was getting more complicated by the minute!  We have always enjoyed the parody videos that the Holderness family makes (look them up on YouTube if you haven't seen them....they are so good!)  Now we were about to create our own.

We have spent time together, been creative, and have laughed a lot.  My husband has amazed me with his video editing skills.  We would never have had the time to do this with our normal schedule.  What ideas do you have of things that your family could do together that wasn't possible before, but is now?  Create memories.  Take advantage of the time you've been given.  And enjoy our creative attempt to bring a smile to your face :)

Quarantined with Teenagers - Week One

While we aren't officially quarantined (no one is sick), we are doing our best to follow the rules and be socially responsible.  Our first week at home was filled with some wins and some challenges.

I knew right away that doing school at home meant we needed structure.  I'm thankful that my boys are self-motivated and independent.  Even so, if given the choice, video games probably rank higher than school work on their list.  So here's what we did that has worked very successfully:





School Hours 8-3, with a one hour lunch/free time break.

Activities allowed during school hours:

• Must check email and do assignments for all classes
• Exercise
• Playing instruments
• Must do one household chore
• Reading
• Other non-screen activities

I have not heard "I'm bored".  There's been very little arguing.  And as you can see in the picture, they have even been helping each other with homework when needed!  WIN!  

Our schedule is typically very full.  While it's been disappointing to have all our plans cancelled, it does give us more time as a family in the evenings.  We've been watching movies together, playing games, and watching home videos (this always gets us laughing). WIN!

The most challenging thing for me right now is managing my own time in a way that reduces anxiety and isolation.  Trying to find that balance between "staying informed" and resting in faith.  It's hard to scroll Facebook anymore without feeling anxious, yet that's how to best stay "connected" to other people. Ugh.  How can I stay emotionally and physically healthy during this time?  

My goal this week is to set a schedule for me.  Not one that is rigid, but one that gives me a plan of how to productively spend my time.  I need to balance the "news" with faith-filled content that gives me perspective.  I need to exercise since I now have the time to actually do it consistently!  I need to clean those places in my house that NEVER get cleaned.  I need to intentionally stay in touch with people.  And whenever possible, I need to get outside (maintaining appropriate social distances, of course).  

This way of life may become our "new normal" for a while, so I plan to embrace the opportunity.  Being forced to spend time with my family is not a hardship.  Grocery shopping online is actually kind of nice.  I can do this.  You can do this.  May we come out of "quarantine" as stronger and healthier people, more thankful for everything we so often take for granted. 

COVID-19

The topic of most conversations and facebook posts this week...the coronavirus.  This is my favorite meme.  What crazy times we're living in!  So it's no surprise that as I was reading my Bible this morning, the Scriptures were speaking to me about our current situation.  Let me start by sharing with you what I read from Hebrews 13:15-17.

"Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise-the fruit of lips that confess his name.  And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.  Obey your leaders and submit to their authority.  They keep watch over you as men who must give an account.  Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you."

A sacrifice of praise.  When events are cancelled that we were looking forward to, disappointment is guaranteed.  Our instinct is to complain and grumble.  My family has been affected by this as I'm sure yours has.  We've had awards banquets and sporting events cancelled.  A musical the boys have been preparing for postponed.  Tickets for CAVS games that most likely will not have spectators.  Not to mention the fact that with schools closing I will be going 3 weeks without pay.  There is plenty to grumble about!  This is when praise becomes a sacrifice.  To choose to think in a positive way and speak in a way that builds others up as opposed to creating more discontentment.  I have loved reading posts from people who are choosing to embrace the downtime with family and see the blessings that come with having calendars that are less full.  This is my challenge:  the next time you feel like complaining, look for the blessing and give praise instead!

Do good and share with others.  I have not been to the grocery store this week, so I have not witnessed the madness firsthand.  From what I've heard, there is a lot of hoarding and selfishness happening in our communities.  Don't buy more than you normally would.  Share with others what you have, including toilet paper!  Let's come together and be the good.

Obey your leaders.  I've read opinions on both sides.  I don't know what the "right" decisions are.  However, I trust that our leaders are more educated than I am on the issues at hand.  They are responsible for our communities and our country.  If they decide to err on the side of caution to try to contain the spread of this virus, we should listen and obey.  Yes, it will be an inconvenience.  But they were elected to make the tough decisions and we need to submit to that authority.  I would rather be inconvenienced than end up in a crisis.

These thoughts have challenged me and reminded me to make the best of these days.  Be wise, be kind, and don't panic - God is still in control.

Bread and Circuses

I just finished reading a book by Levi Lusko called Through the Eyes of a Lion.  One analogy he used jumped off the page for me.  But to understand it, let me refresh your memory with a tiny history lesson...

The setting is Ancient Rome.  This probably brings to mind chariot races, gladiator games, and the Roman Colosseum.  What you might not remember is the purpose behind these games...to prevent civil unrest by keeping the poor happy.  Roman leaders believed that if the people were kept fed and entertained (bread & circuses), they would be less likely to notice, complain, or revolt against the empire.  And it worked!

Because I substitute teach at the junior high school, I get some social studies refreshers from time to time.  So when I read the sub-title "Satan's Weapon: Bread and Circuses" in Levi's book, I knew exactly what he was talking about.  Our enemy has many tactics.  When he can't get us to sin, the next best thing is to distract us to the point that we neglect fulfilling our calling.  He writes "This destruction by distraction is difficult to detect when it's happening, because it doesn't involve bad things but good things - that take the place of the most important things."  By focusing on superficial things we can easily forget about what matters.

Sports.  Television.  Video Games.  Casinos.  Movies.  Concerts.
Are these bad things? No.  Do they distract us?  You bet.

Feeling far from God?  Distance in your marriage?  Kids rebelling or struggling in school?  Neighbors in need of love and hope?  Poor that need help?  We can rise up and do something about these things, or we can numb our minds and appetites with bread and circuses.

Often times it takes a tragedy to open our eyes and re-focus on what's important.  Enjoy life and all it has to offer, but be intentional about what is taking up your time and using your resources.

It's 2020...the year of perfect vision.  Let's keep our eyes open.

Getting Back Up

My boys are fans of the Marvel superhero movies.  This summer we decided as a family to start watching through the movies from beginning to end, in chronological order.  The first movie in the list (although it was one of the most recent to be released) was Captain Marvel.

My favorite scene is near the end.  Carol's enemy is trying to keep her down by reminding her of all her failures...all the times she was weak, defeated, fallen.  But then Carol's perspective shifts.  Instead of focusing on the falling down, she remembers what happens afterward....how she gets back up.  This is what gives her strength and empowers her to fight.



As I was reading my Bible this morning, this verse stood out to me.  In Mark 9:31 Jesus said "The Son of Man is going to be delivered into the hands of men.  They will kill him, and after three days he will rise."  The disciples did not understand.  A Savior that would be killed?  That doesn't make sense.  And in the first few days after Jesus was crucified, they were only able to see the loss and feel the sadness and disappointment.  They had forgotten the second part of this statement....that after three days he will RISE!  That is when God's power and promise are revealed and understood.

In the moment, we tend to only see our failure or loss.  But people of faith can look back and shift their perspective from seeing the failure, to recognizing the moment that we got back up.  We overcame.  That is what gives us strength and hope.

As my boys get older (now 12, 14, and 16) I have to lessen my control and allow them to take on more responsibility.  This is hard because I want to protect them.  I don't want them to fail.  I want to keep them safe.  Yet I also realize that the way they will learn and gain strength is THROUGH this process of failing and getting back up again.  When I start to worry "What If...?", I need to remind myself that God is faithful.  I now have a child driving!  What if...?  How do I control that fear?  By reminding myself that whatever may happen to knock us down, God is faithful, and we will eventually rise.

My challenge to you is to look back on your life as Carol did, by focusing not on your failures and heartaches, but on how you overcame them and got back up.  You can do it again.

"At the bottom of the deepest, darkest what-if imaginable is a faithful God." -Steven Furtick

Yoked Together

As common as this verse is, I frequently need reminded about what a yoke is, and what this verse is saying.

Yoke - A wooden crosspiece that is fastened over the necks of two animals and attached to the plow or cart that they are to pull.

This verse tells me two things.  First, I am not meant to work alone.  A yoke is given for TWO animals to SHARE the load.  Secondly, the burden is light.  If it's getting heavy, I'm either taking on more than I was meant to, or I'm trying to go it alone.

Check out this fact: "Farmers used to yoke the young ox with the old experienced ox to train them.  The old ox will take the major load and the young one will be walking along and learning from him."

When I asked Jesus into my life, I became yoked with Him.  I am to work alongside Him to spread his love and truth, learning from Him along the way.  What a beautiful picture.

"Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you.  Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light."-Matthew 11:28-30

Small Groups on Mission

Over the years I have been a part of many small groups.  They are a great way to connect with other people.  By meeting frequently, you can keep up with what is going on in others lives and care for each other.  By discussing spiritual topics and sharing insight I have grown in my faith.  But the one area that we have failed to implement on a regular basis is to serve together.

Maybe this is why small group attendance starts out strong, and then slowly loses priority.  I was really struck by an excerpt from Jen Hatmaker's book Interrupted.   It's a bit long, but good food for thought...

"Obviously, geographic small groups are not new, but their purpose has often been limited by exclusivity: "This is our group for us to do life together." "Our six families have been together for four years." As small-group pastor for years, Brandon observed that community groups structured mainly for the benefit of their members have about a three-year shelf life.  At this point, the ties dissolve or the fellowship wanes, and they usually disband.

I believe more than simply losing interest, small groups like this evaporate because they aren't on mission, and frankly, that gets boring and unfulfilling.  How long can we sit in the same living room or Sunday school class with the same people talking about the same stuff?  How many discussions can we have about Sunday's sermon?  How long can we sacrifice a night a week for a basic repeat of the last gathering?  It runs out because we weren't created to serve ourselves; we're not wired to take the role of master, but slave.  Blessing blessed people eventually leaves us empty, and despite a church system designed to meet our needs, these words come out of our mouths: "I'm not being fed."

I believe the largest factor in feeling unfed is not feeding others.  It has less to do with your pastor's preaching style or the curriculum you're studying.  We have an innate craving to live on mission with God in the dangerous, exciting world.  Out there is where we come to life, get over ourselves, are fed.  Fulfillment exists in becoming a slave to everyone in order to win someone to Jesus.  Discipleship was never simply about learning; it was constructed on living...

If an endless array of Bible studies, programs, church events, and sermons have left you dry, please hear this: living on mission where you've been sent will transform your faith journey.  At the risks of oversimplifying it, I've seen missional living cure apathy better than any sermon, promote healing quicker than counseling, deepen discipleship more than Bible studies, and create converts more efficiently than events."

She goes on to explain how their small community groups function.  Two weeks a month they meet for traditional fellowship and discussion, one week for serving together in the community or with a nonprofit partner, and one week apart to intentionally live on mission (inviting neighbors over for dinner, hosting a game night, etc...).

There are obviously more opportunities to serve near a big city than a small town like I live in, but with some creativity I think this missional component could still be included.  It may just be the piece that's been missing.